Hope for the Weary
Life has changed rather drastically for Maegan and I over the past few months. If you followed her progress through any of the up's and down's of the hospital stays and doctor visits, than you know that life turned into one big roller-coaster with no end in sight.
During the ordeal, I began to post updates and thoughts here to not only keep everyone somewhat informed as to what was going on, but to also escape from reality for a few minutes and attempt to process what all was going on around me.
Reading back over the events of the summer, I realized that I sugarcoated every post.
Maybe I was in denial or just didn't want to write down what we had just experienced in too much detail. Whatever the reason, Maegan and I were left dealing with the emotional aftermath of a series of traumatic events. Even when talking to close friends and family we skim over the tough parts simply because we don't want to have to feel those feeling again.
Fact: repressed emotions don't just go away. We feel as if it is time to write out the story as it truly happened. Just the true, stripped-down, bare-bones, as-real-as-it-happened, feelings and experiences that Maegan and I endured in order to leave no stone unturned.
More importantly, we are writing this to show how God brought us through impossible situations so that we could deeply share how he continues to draw us to Him. Every event, every doctor, every hospital visit, led us to exactly were God wanted us (even though it didn't seem like it at the time).
---------------
I'm reminded of a story of a person who decides to take a midnight hike and follow a friend up to the peak of a mountain. They know this friend has hiked many times and knows exactly where every turn in the trail lies and follows them over miles of rough terrain, through thick forests, around black lakes of frozen water, and around treacherous bends. She continues to follow and refuses to take her eyes off of his back until they reach the summit. As they arrived, they were greeted with one of the most beautiful sunrises she had ever seen. The cold, fresh breeze restored her tired lungs and the colors of the sunrise melted away every cold feeling in her heart. Life stood still. After catching her breath she looked down and saw the trail that they had just spent several hours hiking up. There were spots were they were merely inches from the cliff where one stumble or loose rock would have meant certain death.
She states, "If I would have known how dangerous the climb would have been, I would have never decided to follow you on this hike!"
He replies, "I know. But you would also never see what was waiting at the end of the journey..."
---------------
God took us into a series of events and situations that left us no choice but to cling, blindly to his arms and let him lead us. If I would have know exactly what was going to happen with Maegan I would have still married her; I would have still loved her dearly. However, I would have known what to tell the doctors about and stop this thing before it happened. The end result? God wouldn't have received the glory...I would have. The worth that holds versus the eternal worth Christ holds for us is hardly a drop in the ocean when compared.
We are choosing to write our story not to point at what we did to try to make it through, but to show exactly how God never left us, never forsook us and never left our side.
No matter how little strength we had on our own, he always brings Hope for the Weary.
During the ordeal, I began to post updates and thoughts here to not only keep everyone somewhat informed as to what was going on, but to also escape from reality for a few minutes and attempt to process what all was going on around me.
Reading back over the events of the summer, I realized that I sugarcoated every post.
Maybe I was in denial or just didn't want to write down what we had just experienced in too much detail. Whatever the reason, Maegan and I were left dealing with the emotional aftermath of a series of traumatic events. Even when talking to close friends and family we skim over the tough parts simply because we don't want to have to feel those feeling again.
Fact: repressed emotions don't just go away. We feel as if it is time to write out the story as it truly happened. Just the true, stripped-down, bare-bones, as-real-as-it-happened, feelings and experiences that Maegan and I endured in order to leave no stone unturned.
More importantly, we are writing this to show how God brought us through impossible situations so that we could deeply share how he continues to draw us to Him. Every event, every doctor, every hospital visit, led us to exactly were God wanted us (even though it didn't seem like it at the time).
---------------
I'm reminded of a story of a person who decides to take a midnight hike and follow a friend up to the peak of a mountain. They know this friend has hiked many times and knows exactly where every turn in the trail lies and follows them over miles of rough terrain, through thick forests, around black lakes of frozen water, and around treacherous bends. She continues to follow and refuses to take her eyes off of his back until they reach the summit. As they arrived, they were greeted with one of the most beautiful sunrises she had ever seen. The cold, fresh breeze restored her tired lungs and the colors of the sunrise melted away every cold feeling in her heart. Life stood still. After catching her breath she looked down and saw the trail that they had just spent several hours hiking up. There were spots were they were merely inches from the cliff where one stumble or loose rock would have meant certain death.
She states, "If I would have known how dangerous the climb would have been, I would have never decided to follow you on this hike!"
He replies, "I know. But you would also never see what was waiting at the end of the journey..."
---------------
God took us into a series of events and situations that left us no choice but to cling, blindly to his arms and let him lead us. If I would have know exactly what was going to happen with Maegan I would have still married her; I would have still loved her dearly. However, I would have known what to tell the doctors about and stop this thing before it happened. The end result? God wouldn't have received the glory...I would have. The worth that holds versus the eternal worth Christ holds for us is hardly a drop in the ocean when compared.
We are choosing to write our story not to point at what we did to try to make it through, but to show exactly how God never left us, never forsook us and never left our side.
No matter how little strength we had on our own, he always brings Hope for the Weary.
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